Hey! Welcome back and I shall be continuing on from last week…
So, my young self was expecting this guy to reciprocate his love to me in the same way I showed love to him. First and foremost that was never going to happen because he’s just not that kinda guy anyway, and I actually do the most, and secondly, due to things that were going on at the time and things I’ve come to learn, recognise and appreciate years down the line, was that this guy couldn’t love because he didn’t know love. His experience of love had not been positive and therefore to express something he didn’t experience or know was foreign.
As mentioned in my previous post, this is by no means excuses for allowing any form of emotional manipulation and other forms of disrespect and mistreatment and of course every situation is different and needs to be looked at, spoken about with trusted friends, prayed on etc, but these are just my little tidbits that I have learnt over the years and wish to share with you.
Over the past few months, I’ve been in my thinking bag and been asking myself some questions around my expectations, myself and relationships.
It’s not the easiest of topics for me. Relationship stuff and and matters of the heart is just quite a touchy and sensitive topic personally, but it’s been a great learning curve. .
Some of the questions I’ve been pondering on:
- How do I receive love in this season and to go even deeper what does this look like in my relationships?
- In my present relationships, am I loving people how I want to be loved or am I loving them in a way that fills up their tank?
- Have I placed unrealistic and unreasonable expectations on some of the relationships in my life? If so, why? Why am I placing such high expectations on these relationships? Is it signifying that there is a lack somewhere in me that I am trying to use other people to fill?
- What are my relationships like with my parents and my siblings or family? What role do I have to play in the home and what impact does this have on my relationships outside of my family setting?
- If I don’t receive love in the way I desire, what do I do about it? How do I feel about it?
- What do I think about myself? If someone doesn’t react/respond to something about me in the way I had hoped, what happens? How do I take it? Do I take it personally as a reflection on me or…
Use these questions in your own quiet/reflecting time and see what you come up with.
Your relationship with yourself is important because it’s what you have within that you will be able to offer to those around you.
Take care and write you next week,