Changes, emotions, expectations

Love and Relationships

So in my last post, I wrote briefly about letting go of what you thought it was and facing what it is when it came to the area of relationships.  

Still in the whole relationship mindset, I want to continue by talking about changes, emotions and expectations.

In my research and prep for this post and the ones to follow, I read a few articles and I came across something that really spoke to me. Brian Tabb wrote in his article The Unexpected God that ‘God sent us the Messiah we really needed and not the one anyone expected.’ That really resonated with me because it made me think, when it does come to relationships have I built an idealistic image in my head that essentially is based on what I want/think I want, things that I see on the socials but is not necessarily what I need? Food for thought and I guess something that can be explored further in another post, so as to not get too far away from what I want to cover today…

First and foremost, nothing but the Word of God lasts forever. Isaiah even confirms this. Nothing on this earth will last forever, I mean look how quickly technology changes. Ask me what the latest song or dance craze is, I have no clue whatsoever and I’m totally okay with that by the way. 

Relationships change because people change. This is why when getting into a relationship it is so important to be equally yoked because if you both are grounded on the same foundation, believe in the same principles and adhere to the same Truth, then irrespective of the changes that will come, you will have a greater chance of being able to weather the storms.

Changes occur. There is no way you are going to be the same person that you are today in the next 10 years. I mean if in an intellectual capacity one does not want to change then that is up to them, but physically there will be changes and emotionally as well because life will happen and test our emotions.

Changes can sometimes mean inconsistency, uncertainty, doubt, confusion and sometimes when we attach ourselves to a person and changes happen in their life it can sometimes rock our own lives too. What happens then?  Food for thought.

Be careful with absolutism when it comes to the heart and emotions i.e. when you are speaking, texting etc. Matthew says let your yes be your yes and your no be your no. Really try as much as you can to just say what you know you can do, especially if there are feelings involved. Verbal promises and declarations can release seeds of hope and expectancy in the heart, and if you know you can’t encourage those seeds to germinate and blossom, then it’s not really fair to just leave them sitting. Alongside this, if you know you are easily swayed by words then ask the Lord to help you guard your heart in a way that won’t let you be so swayed and smitten by people’s words. 

Songs of Solomon says that we should not awaken love before it’s time and sometimes making verbal and written declarations of emotion can awaken/ignite passion in the heart of someone, so if you know you cannot continue to feed that, then just don’t start it in the first place.

It does come down to emotional discipline and maturity though because the heart and the head in these cases can sometimes be enemies but I’m going to leave that as a to be continued…

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